Eddie B says...

As in Borycewicz, US Olympic cycling coach for the early eighties: "You must cover your knees until it is at least 65 degrees."

I was amazed (or appalled) at the sheer number of uncovered cyclist knees I saw on my ride tonight. Red, chapped knees suffering in the spring breeze, the rider they were connected to probably wondering why they couldn't go any faster.

I guess I shouldn't care, it's their knees, but now that we're all in the same insurance pool*, I resent having to pay for the eventual knee replacement they'll require because they were too macho to cover their knees at 55 degrees. This goes for the women riders, too, who apparently suffer the same foolishness as their male counterparts.

Kudos, then, to the rider on the sleek black carbon Pinarello sporting their new Pearl Izumi knickers, a bargain at $185 compared to knee surgery (if my wife is reading this, don't I deserve a pair?) I was positively filled with knicker envy, my 20-year-old team issue leg warmers bunching up under my shorts of similar vintage.

But, hey, we were all out tonight chasing that elusive entity called fitness on a fine spring day! Given the number of riders I did see, I would think that one of us should corner and catch him/her/it - maybe with my warm, protected knees, it'll be me!

*A gross and inaccurate generalization, used here purely for the comedic effect. Or maybe not. I already get my insurance from the government, and the addition of those 30 million has already driven my costs up. I gotta say that I enjoyed having my needs socialized, even though I'm certain that it will prove a corrupting influence on others.**

**You didn't think this referred to me, did you? Of course not, that's the Boehner dude at his finest! (paraphrased by yours truly.)